in erotica writing, or just a smut Tumblr drabble, when someone calls a woman’s pussy “her sex”, i snort louder than Benny even does.
written thing: “his fingers found her sex”
me:
Same. Mine are “her mound…” or “her Venus mont…”
Me:
ughhh haha god, yes.
Some other bad ones I’ve read are “innermost” and “her soft cookie”
“Her innermost”?? Her innermost what? That’s like saying “I bought four.” It’s not a complete sentence!!
This is LITERALLY why I started writing my own smut, because dear god it had to better than some of the shit that was ACTUALLY BEING PUBLISHED.
💋
Lol so true…..but cunt and pussy get tiring after a while too.
I hate wet slit….if you can’t come up with anything better, just say wet pussy.
Slit. Like its a cut in a piece of paper
I know, right?
I’ve had the very same complaint for years… and personally, I think it reveals a deplorable weakness in our culture. Why are there so few words to describe the intimate parts of a woman’s body? In fact, those words we DO have are saddled with a history of being used as insults. I mean, are we still so stuck in a puritanical bias against sexuality that we can’t venture beyond it in the 21st Century?
I think maybe we need to start a social movement or something… because I agree with you all. 🙂
It is hilarious the amount of articles written on what not to call the vagina. Obviously, these are tacky cheesy ones, but it made me laugh hard.
1. Vajeen
2. Vajayjay
3. Box
4. Nether regions
5. Lady business
6. Lady V
7. Hoo-haw
8. Cha-cha
9. Lady bits
10. Crotch
11. Muff
12. Kitty
13. Cooch
14. Cooter
15. Snatch
16. Snapper
17. Beaver
18. Cookie
19. Cupcake
20. Coin purse
21. Lady flower
22. Honey pot
23. Poon
24. Punani
25. Twat
26. Gash
27. Banana basket
28. Flower pot
29. Fine china
30. Juice box
31. Pink panther
32. Hot pocket
33. Bikini bizkit
34. Penis fly trap
35. Vertical smile
36. Dew flaps
37. Flaming lips
38. Puff pillow
39. Notorious V.A.G.
40. Furburger
41. Bearded clam
42. Sausage wallet
43. Panty hamster
44. Meat curtains
45. Penis garage
46 Pink taco
47. Axe wound
48. Penis snuggie
49. Pussy
50. Cunt
Thread over, everyone.
I amtotally calling my pussy the Notorious V.A.G. from here on out.
@danipup maybe I missed it but I feel you neglected a huge one. Clunge. Also I cannot stand flower analogies. “He parted her delicate petals and found her inner flower ready and waiting for his seed.” Like… are you fucking or is this a nature documentary?!
There are some sensations in the world you will never be able to get used to. Things like nails on a chalkboard, a rock in your shoe… some feelings are just not meant to be ignored. You can’t compartmentalize them and push them to the side. They overpower your brain, remaining front and center.
This is one of those… the feeling of my tongue softly flicking back and forth over your edged, tortured clit. Back and forth, back and forth… a steady rhythm that won’t let you cum, but keeps you ever so close to the edge. You can’t get used to it, you can’t ignore it…
…all you can do is suffer.
please tie me down so i cant move even an inch away, put a gag in so you dont have to listen to my pathetic begging to cum, spread my lips, expose my cute little clit and do this to me for hours, edging me relentlessly and just laugh at how my poor clit pulses under your tongue…
I greeted him at the door on 4″ heels, a high ponytail, and a satin apron.
He pushed me into my apartment with hungry kisses and desperate gropes.
I peeled back the layers of a long day at work: briefcase with a thud by the door and the friction of his belt through each belt loop. The buckle jingling as it fell to the floor.
He bent me over the table and thrust himself against my back and ass before unzipping and revealing his excitement to me. I ran the stiletto heel up his inseam while using the mental map of his body to guide my hands to revisit my treasure.
His mouth and hands raced to discover every spot that would make me gasp or moan. I cocked my head and squirmed in the shadow of his stature. The high ponytail danced against my skin.
He grasped my long brown tresses at the tip and recalled all the photos and videos in his wank bank of arched backs and bent necks.
He yanked so hard that he herniated C5-6. During the surgery for my artificial disc replacement, my surgeon found a bone shard 3mm from my spinal cord.
The man who whispered in my ear of how i was “marriage material” moved to Toronto 2 weeks after he damn near made me into a quadriplegic. He closed on a house the day of my surgery.
To this day, I jump when someone puts their hands near my head. My ears ring constantly. And every time I see one of you all post a photo of someone having their hair pulled, I think about all the pain one dumb, badly-executed move caused me.
1. Get consent.
2. Give warning.
3. Grab slowly and smoothly at the roots
4. Movement comes from the wrist (minimizes chance of injury to directional force)
5. If need be, let the person with the hair being pulled hold on to your wrist to either limit your movement or as a failsafe.
6. Over time develop trust with your partner to dial up neck extension, force, or speed.
All that and the fucker never even gave me a single orgasm.
Too important not to reblog
😳
I am so sorry for what you experienced @ifitpleasuresme. Thank you for sharing this wake-up call.
Signal boost. If you go charging into a scene thinking you can act like they act in those gonzo BDSM porn loops, you’re a fool. Always keep the Safe in Safe, Sane, and Consensual. If you are not absolutely sure of what you’re doing in a scene, don’t fucking do it.
Another device to make sure the plug stays inside.
There is no getting away, not much room for movement except a bit of squirming. Nothing is as unforgiving in restriction as thick metal, and this is a good example of it.
Sure she’s no Einstein, but she was smart enough to know why this was maybe as humiliating as it could get. – She felt on total display. Embarrassed and full of shame. There was no milk in her udders, nor would there be any need for some, so the only reason was: making her feel like an animal in order to degrade her. Her voice and the ability to move, taken away from her and stripped of cloth and personality while getting treated like livestock. Her head was filled with screaming voices telling her more and more arguments why this was degrading and humiliating and one of her worst experiences ever – and it for sure was, and she felt horribly ashamed and creeped out in general but especially about her soaking wet pussy. She couldn’t help herself, she wanted to get fucked. Drilled. Hard. She needed it! Then she started to cry while she realized that she was in fact that animal, that her master was portraying the whole time.
SubbyLittleKitten 